Anxiety is a state of being overly concerned or fearful, which may interfere with daily functioning. Everyone experiences anxiety, but for others, it becomes overwhelming and disrupts their emotional, physical, and mental well-being and that is where how to cope with your partner’s anxiety comes in.
Symptoms of anxiety include rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, nausea, muscle tension, insomnia, panic attack, and constant obsessive thinking. Anxiety manifests differently in different people and can be as bad as not being able to conduct one’s daily affairs.
HOW ANXIETY AFFECTS RELATIONSHIPS
Anxiety not only impacts the person going through it—it also affects their relationships. The following are some of the ways a partner’s anxiety disorder can affect a relationship:
- Emotional Well-being: A partner may have a heavier emotional load, which creates stress and fatigue.
- Social Life: Anxiety will lead a partner to avoid social interactions, creating tension if the other prefers socializing.
- Finances: If anxiety complicates employment, financial pressure may result.
- Daily Living: Tasks such as cooking, cleaning, and childcare can disproportionately fall on one partner, causing frustration.
Knowing how anxiety affects a relationship is the beginning of creating a support and balance on how to cope with your partner’s anxiety.
SUPPORTING YOUR PARTNER WITH ANXIETY
Having a partner with an anxiety disorder can be difficult. Here are some tips to assist:
- Know That Anxiety is Distinct from Your Partner
Your partner is not their disease. Treat them with compassion and empathy rather than stigmatizing them for their condition.
- Do Not Blame
Anxiety is not something one chooses. It occurs because of the interplay of genes, physiology, and the environment. Instead of blaming, be supportive and encourage them.
- Find Triggers
Learning what provokes your partner’s anxiety can make it easier to reassure them. Cutting out triggers entirely may not be worth it in the long run. Encourage your partner to overcome their fears in a secure, controlled setting.
- Be Unconditionally Supportive
Being there with your partner can be incredibly effective. Listen without criticism and offer reassurance without trying to “cure” their anxiety.
COMMUNICATION TIPS
When experiencing an anxiety attack, having an idea of what to say (and what not to say) can reassure your partner that everything will be alright.
Useful Phrases:
- “I’m here and I’m listening.”
- “It’s going to be okay.”
- “Would you like me to sit with you?”
- “Is there anything I can do to help?”
Phrases to Avoid:
- “Calm down!”
- “You’re overreacting.”
- “This is all in your head.”
- “You have nothing to worry about.”
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HOW TO ASSIST A PARTNER WITH ANXIETY
- Listen Without Assumption
Allow your partner to express their thoughts and emotions without jumping to conclusions or offering immediate solutions.
- Avoid Judgment
Anxiety can make a person feel vulnerable. If they open up to you, be mindful not to judge or invalidate their feelings.
- Be Patient
Anxiety symptoms can fluctuate. Support your partner at their own pace and reassure them that you’ll be there regardless of how they’re feeling.
- Provide Stability
Anxiety will cause a “what-if” cycle. Grounding techniques, like deep breathing or touching, will help them remember that they are here now.
- Get Them to Acknowledge Their Anxiety
Instruct your partner to step away from anxious thoughts. With approaches like narrative therapy, they will become able to put anxiety outside themselves instead of identifying with it as themselves.
- Keep Choices Simple
Anxiety can complicate decision-making. Having few options (e.g., “Do you want to talk on the couch or for a walk?”) can reduce stress.
- Encourage Outdoor Activity
Fresh air and activity can help ease anxiety. Suggest a short walk, but don’t pressure your partner if he/she is not prepared.
- Reassure Them
People with anxiety often feel guilty for how their condition affects others. Let your partner know that their feelings are valid and that you’re making a conscious choice to support them.
CONCLUSION
Learning how to cope with your partner’s anxiety takes patience, understanding, and communication. There is no quick fix, and every relationship is unique. By listening, being supportive, and empathetic, you can build a foundation for a good relationship regardless of what anxiety can bring your way.