It is natural that you might find it difficult to deal with your partner’s ex relationships, but knowing how to embrace their past will strengthen your relationship. The following are ways you can deal with your partner’s ex relationships in a positive way:
COMMUNICATION
There should be open communication when dealing with matters concerning your partner’s past. If you are not sure or have questions, communicate openly and honestly with them. This will build trust and eliminate misunderstandings.
STOP OVERANALYZING EVERYTHING
It is easy to overthink your partner’s past relationships and create unnecessary stress. Rather than focusing on their past, concentrate on your present relationship and get professional assistance if anxiety overwhelms you.
DON’T LET YOURSELF BE JEALOUS
Your partner’s past is in the past, and those former relationships no longer shape their current life. Rather than being jealous, put your energy into developing a strong and trusting relationship.
CONSIDER WHAT YOU FEEL AND BELIEVE ABOUT THEM
If you believe your partner is your soulmate, put aside past problems and consider your future life together. It is most critical how you and your partner construct your relationship today.
ATTEMPT TO BE ACCEPTING OF THEIR PAST
Acceptance does not equate to ignoring your emotions but in accepting their past without it controlling your relationship. Be open with yourself and your partner while having a positive attitude.
KEEP A SAFE DISTANCE FROM SOCIAL MEDIA
Social media can cause unhealthy comparisons. Avoid as much as possible exposure to your partner’s exes online or even block them if need be to preserve emotional health.
INFORM THEM OF YOUR FEARS AND CONCERNS
If you are uncomfortable with your partner’s past, let them know about your fears. Once you have an open discussion, trust their response and go on without suspicion.
PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SITUATION
Place yourself in your partner’s shoes and consider how you would react if you were being interrogated about your past continually. Knowing the courage it takes to be honest about past relationships can bring forth sympathy and thankfulness.
DON’T LET IT MANAGE YOUR THOUGHTS
Thinking constantly about your partner’s history can be a strain on your relationship. Consciously shift your thoughts to the here and now to avoid unnecessary tension.
THINK ABOUT YOUR CURRENT RELATIONSHIP
Remember why you and your partner chose each other. Write down on paper the good things about your relationship so you remember your trust in each other.
TRUST THEM
Trust is the foundation of any relationship. If your partner has chosen to be with you, trust their decision unless you have good reasons to doubt them.
DO NOT FEEL A SENSE OF BETRAYAL
If your partner cheated in past relationships but not the current one, do not resent past actions. Forgiveness and moving on are important for a healthy relationship.
BE AWARE OF YOUR PAST
Both you and your partner do have a past. Both of you are growing and learning together without mentioning the past.
DO NOT GIVE UP!
If you need to take time to embrace their past, be kind to yourself. Provide yourself with time sufficient enough to soak up feelings without hurrying into choices.
FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCTS
If no red flags have appeared in your relationship, believe that your suspicions may be for nothing. Yet, if the problems continue, consider whether or not this relationship is meeting your needs.
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AN IMPORTANT NOTE
Jealousy could be more of a reflection on your own insecurities than what your partner is doing. Try grounding techniques, write down your thoughts, and stick to facts instead of emotions.
THINK ABOUT WHAT ANNOYS YOU THE MOST
Identify specifically what you don’t like about their history and address them. If numbers or history irk you, address the root of your irritability.
SEEK THERAPY
If your feelings overwhelm you, consider speaking with a therapist. Couples therapy will also enhance communication and emotional security.
CONCLUSION
Accepting a partner’s history is an essential part of building a healthy and trusting relationship. Instead of dwelling on their history, think about the relationship you now have. If the bad feelings persist, reflection and professional help could be useful. It is natural that you might find it difficult to deal with your partner’s ex relationships, but love is really about tolerating one another for whom you are currently, and not for whom you used to be.